i guess i feel like the army, undervalued. by work and by family. the army, after winning the days battle feels confused because their king is saddened by the outcome. they dont receive praise, honor, recognition, rest. just ignored. like they were fighting for nothing. so the army presents themselves to the king. here i am. ready for duty. morale is low but im still with you. give me reason. give me purpose. how am i like this army? after all my struggle i receive no recognition and it all goes unseen. as if i didnt do anything. work does not care for me or even know i exist. if they give me reason to stay i would. but i am ready to desert. do i speak up? do i value myself more than i should?
again i find this book misleading. david was right to mourn. now he didnt do everything right but he wasnt being lame like this made him out to be. his generals disobeyed his direct orders, his soldiers knew it. and he didnt addrerss that. he should have congradulated the armies on their battle and then grieved collectively because of absaloms death and the treachery. david is full of love and thats amazing. he just gets too caught up in it. let me not get caught up in love. see beyond my nose and have wisdom to bless.
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