God Of The Asylum-City

just. loving. forgiving. trusting.
these describe you god. especially in relation to the asylum cities. you wanted there to be a safe place for the accused. to find shelter, rest, and acceptance. because god we are accused (sometimes even guilty) yet you accept us in to protect us from avengers.
guilt? no. shame, some. ive definitely not responded properly to some stuff. and thats ok. it happens. i feel bad, know how i was wrong, and hopefully figure out how to prevent it. oh and repair. definitely need to make repairs and not let small cracks spread. on my heart...troubling me? slightly how i acted towards laura on thursday. i know ive gotten over it but i havent apologized. i can assume shes fine based on the past couple of days but those cracks can be hard to notice and i want to make sure its fixed.
god you know what ive been thinking because youve been leading me in it. the thoughts to apologize and looking to be better are your influeance. and since you know anyway and weve talked too, im not uncomfortable sharing with you. its so easy to share my thoughts and feelings with you. the harder part is that its also being shared with whoever. but thats not even uncomfortable. i want to be real, especially with people who can encourage me in it and can be encourage too. and god thats why im comfortable sharing my thoughts and actions with you.
a god of justice AND refuge. almost contradictory. for i know you are a just and jealous/vengeful god. that you will bring about the according consequances...unless i take refuge in you. you give me the choice. life or death. while i choose life i still act according to death. but were working through that. i faith that we will attain vicotry over sin together.
seems like a strnge system to me. but its your word and the israelites followed it. unless i just misunderstood it. but it sounded like if the accused was found innocent he stays in the asylum until the high priest dies and then is free. if he leaves prior the avenger may kill him and thats ok. why is that? was that i mean. or did i just not get it? all i have to gain is understanding and knowledge of you god. something you alot in your accordance.